Vblogging

Between fake news, spoiled sports millionaires and really dumb reality shows, I have not been watching much commercial TV lately. As an alternative I have started watching YouTube videos which have turned out to be surprisingly entertaining and informative. There are some talented people out there who make a very good living producing professional videos.

After a long and exhaustive study of these videos (okay, it may have been a few hours of binge watching while consuming mass quantities of alcohol), I believe I have discovered the secret to successful vblogging...

1. Initially, you have to reach a large number of viewers. This is generally done by creating a video that goes viral. First, you need an interesting title such as “What Would A Chair Look Like If Your Knees Bent In The Other Direction” or “Microwaving Cats For Fun & Profit”. Second, you need an eye catching thumbnail photo (aka "clickbait"). Scantily clothed women or cute kids/pets work best. Third, you need a video about something that very few people have seen before. Things like a politician telling the truth or California reducing taxes would be good examples.
2. Second, although a viral video will get you a large number of views, you need to produce quality, engaging videos on a regular basis to add subscribers to your channel. This is known as WORK! I suspect this is where Millennials still living with their parents lose interest in this post.
3. Lastly, you need to create the illusion of a personal connection with your viewers. I believe this is why attractive, young women and eccentric, hyperactive men do well. This is also the reason I will never make the big bucks vblogging as the only people interested in my lifestyle are insomniacs looking for ways to fall asleep.

I hope this short tutorial is helpful and will prepare you for a successful career as a YouTuber.